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Showing posts from June, 2016

It takes two to make it awkward

We were required to take a class during each of our basic science semesters called: Doctor-Patient Relationship (DPR).  I've mentioned this class here before- it always sort of cracked me up that we had a class to teach us how to be decent human beings and interact with other people.  
Over drinks one night, a couple of us were casually reminiscing about those classes.  I couldn't remember the name of our first DPR professor and accidentally called her "Floppy Johnson-" Freudian slip, my bad.  
Dr. Floppy Johnson was this sweet (and odd) little old lady who strongly believed in the importance of making your patients feel comfortable no matter what you were asking them.  She taught us how to take sexual histories from the patients.  She made us role-play at asking and answering these questions.  I think she even made some students act out a couple of scenarios in front of the class.  At the time we all giggled and did as she asked, but I'm pretty sure most of us w…

If you've been called "sensitive" lately, this is for you

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."
               -Eleanor Roosevelt



This is one of my mama's favorite quotes.  She likes to remind me of this when I am feeling particularly crappy.  Her take is that you have a choice when unpleasant things happen.  You can either take whatever thing someone has said or done to you and internalize it as truth or you can say "nope" to the whole kit and caboodle and not accept the crappy thing and move on.  (She was pretty much advocating for "resilience" before that word that got thrown around a lot)

That sounds mostly reasonable.  You can't control what other people do or say, but you can control how you respond to those things.

However, I did say "mostly reasonable."  Because to me, on further evaluation, Mrs. Roosevelt was cooking up some bullshit.

People are always gonna try and tear you down.  People are mean.  People are thoughtless.  People are shitty.

Saying that it takes …

Weird Animal Metaphors and Bonus Eyeball Tetanus

Mom: Got apples on both trees, eat your heart out John Clark
May 22 12:50 PM

Mom: Made quiche out of yolks from angle food cake, sun dried tomatoes and Swiss cheese.  Soooo ggoooooddddd.
May 22 12:51 PM

Mom: I can still learn something
May 22 12:51 PM



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Mom: Nothing says "loser" faster than some scraggly chin whiskers
May 23 6:43 PM

Mom: Especially ones that curl under the chin
May 23 6:43 PM



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Mom: Take a guess on what woke us up at 3 AM by incessantly triggering the driveway alarm and being ever so visible in the moonlight
May 24 6:43 AM

Mom: Yep, you got it, your dog Memphis, Rhetta not so visible with dark fur.  They dug out.
May 24 6:44 AM

Mom: They have lost their sensibles
May 24 6:45 AM

Me: Oh no!  Where? How? Why?
May 24 7:41 AM

Mom: Dug under front fence, we think counter-attacking a possum.  Plan for today when Clayton comes home is to smoke the culvert
May 24 8:42 AM

Mom: We love some smoke and fires
May 24 8:43 AM

Me: The dogs will be so happy if you get that possum for …

Stories from the Saba Files

The first time my parents came to visit me on Saba, I think they were pretty shocked.  Apparently my descriptions hadn't done it justice.  They stayed for a couple days, got the full tour of the island and that was that.  
During their time on the island I had my favorite taxi driver, Garvis, (that is NOT said "Jarvis," you say it with the "G") cart us around.  Garvis was my favorite because he would show up on time consistently.  Once I was hitchhiking to the airport and he gave me a ride for free.  Garvis was my guy.
My parents liked him too.  He pretty much gave us a historical tour of the island while driving us place to place.  When we stopped for lunch, he decided to come in with us and grab a beer.  My parents liked him enough that they wanted to buy him a beer.  He joined us and continued to tell us awesome stories about the island. It was really sweet.  We finished our lunch and then decided to walk back to our hotel.  Garvis had to go pick up more fares…