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Showing posts from October, 2015

Life is hard and things are shitty sometimes

Life is hard and things are shitty sometimes.  That seems obvious, but I think it's important to acknowledge it.  Say it with me: Life is hard and things are shitty sometimes.
Lately I find myself pretending everything is okay when it isn't.  This is bad.  It's unhealthy and it's becoming a pattern.  And I don't think this is a problem that is unique to me, I think this is something we all do- we put on a brave face and power through.
It seems easier to power through.  Feelings are messy and no one likes a mess.   
A couple of days ago a patient that I had become invested in died.  I say invested, instead of liked or knew because he was already comatose when he became my patient.  He had no family.  He was dirty and his story (what little we knew of it) was sad.  But he was a fighter.  Every day for a week or so when I checked on his progress he would have invariably pulled himself a little further out of death's grasp.  Until the day that he didn't.  He died …